You said this breakup was just a hiccough
But we both knew you would not see this through.
Your nail traced my scar, reviving my wound.
I tried to scream but could not make a sound.
The thought of your absence etched in my mind,
Ethereal tonight like the waning wind.
Those butterflies believing your sick lies
Died in my gut drowning in muffled cries.
Why did you make me fall in love with genies?
I fell in love to fill my void,
To break the silence of my night,
To heal the despair from my blight—
I fell in love with my heart destroyed.
But the love I found in loneliness
It took your broken heart for me to see,
To choose a love in solitude
Is to lose the solitude in love.
When I was younger
I loved to play catch.
I loved the way the wind
Brushed against my face and
I loved the freedom it gave me
I loved the challenge of catching
Someone fast and
I always loved being faster.
I came to realize that
It never mattered who I was chasing,
As long as I had someone to chase.
And I know this is no excuse,
But I wish you could forgive me,
Because I fell in love with the chase
Instead of falling in love with you.
Only this candle sat central,
Its unflinching flame fastened
Secure within its coiled wall,
Mocking my desolation.
Tearing away with every drop
Yet stubborn of its own destruction.
I didn’t make it stop. I couldn’t,
Because then I’d lose my companion.
But then the flame shook,
Flickering in and out of passion,
Before finally drowning
In the sea its tears designed.
I swore never to love you,
But that was never my choice to make.
“I’m sorry I broke your heart,” you said.
No, I’m sorry I broke my promise.
With a tattoo of your name
Etched on my restless heart,
I loved you.
Cradling its beating tame
In your perilous hands,
In the void where I lay
With these voices in my head
I finally understand how
Silence can be so deafening.