Oblivion

Those who say that
It is always darkest before dawn
Have never woken up
Alone
With hearts of vacuum.

Cat and Mouse

You turned the corner
And stopped.
I thought you were far ahead
So I ran faster and faster
Until my defiant
Heart hammered
Between my
Extinguished lungs.
I was right — you were gone,
But I was the one who ran away.

Jigsaw

I think about you only in
Fragments,
Fleeting moments,
Occupying the idle spaces of my mind.
You would intrude like visions in a dream
I cannot control, but only in
Frames. Pictures, frozen in time.
Memories—I confess—I wish I treasured.

I’d think about us in fragments,
Piecing them together in that lonely hour.

Pendulum

And again, I dreamt of you last night.
I don’t remember much of what it entailed,
Except that I saw only you.
You were smiling —
Not like the way you left,
But like the day we met.

We were happy in that dream.
I was happy.
My mind drifted to moments,
Memories of us, what I chose to suppress.
I might have smiled in my sleep
Until I shuddered into reality.

I sprang up in darkness, cold and alone,
Gradually accepting that archaic, forlorn happiness.
Crumbling back into bed half awake
In the pendulum of consciousness,
I wondered if you were dreaming of me too.

Plausible Deniability

I’m in bed. Spinning head. Mine.
Where’s my phone?         There it is.
I taste the tequila in my mouth.
Or is that the vodka?
They all taste the same the morning after.
How did I get back?
I can only remember in fragments
Like sometimes in
A dream where nothing
Makes sense.
That song from Oasis —
Where were you while we were getting high?
I was dancing with a stranger.
It was cold outside.
My feet moving on autopilot.
What happened between those gaps?
I hope I didn’t do anything bad.
I check my phone for answers.
My world’s still spinning around, I don’t know why.